The Godfather

The Godfather (1972)

Director: Frances Ford Coppola

Starring: Marvon Brando, Al PACINO, James Can, Roberts Duvall.

Everyone has been raving about this classic for years, so I have decided to offer my two cents (1.4p) and hopefully offer the definitive review.

Unfortunately I found it to be very disappointing. For a start the title is a total misnomer. There are no godfathers even in the film. The film is also too long; it’s 4 hours but feels like 5!  And the plot makes no sense whatsoever. I literally had no idea what was going on or why.

Marvon Brando plays Vito Corrleeown, a morbidly obese Italian gangster with an unfortunate speech impediment. He has a huge family and likes to throw parties for ungrateful guests. The opening party scene was great because I really enjoy accordion music, but sadly it was all downhill after that!

From what I could gather, Vito was picking on some other gangster and the other gangster decided to get revenge. I think it had something to do with Vito placing a dismembered horses head in his bed as a prank. The other gangster took exception to this and gunned down Vito’s son Sonny (played by James Caaaan). And then Vito is shot (SPOILER ALERT!) and his other son Michael (played by Al Pacino) takes over. There is also another son played by Robert Duvall, but he is somehow German and isn’t allowed to make tough decisions. There are also some women in the film.

The 'plot' ambles along clumsily until Vito finally dies (SPOILER ALERT!) and Michael takes over properly. He then kills everyone in sight to stop the police finding out (I think - I didn't actually watch through to the end).

As you can guess there is some appalling violence in this film. A man is shot in the head, a man is shot multiple times with a machine gun, a man is shot in the head, a man is strangled, and a man is shot in the head. To make matters worse, the afforementioned horse is killed! It’s bad enough killing a person, but a horse? A man is also threatened with a dead fish.

There is some comedy. For example, Vito's speaking voice IS hilarious, but it was difficult to understand him. Why cast a funny guy like Brando (who is famous for his crazy splastick and one-liners) but make him impossible to understand? Crazy decision. I did like the bit when Hugh Grant turns up and starts trying to speak like a gangster, but this was too little too late in my opinion.

This was also a very dark film. And by dark, I mean it was too dark to see what was going on. I had to instruct my housekeeper to raise the TV contrast and brightness to 100. Even then it seemed dark, but in retrospect these may have been night scenes.

Almost everyone involved went on to better things. Apart from James Caaan. Frances Ford Coppola later directed the unforgettable Tucker: The Man And His Dream. Robert Duvall was brilliant in that film where he wears a cowboy hat and Al Pacino is great in everything. In fact, Pacino was totally flattened by the talent bus, going on to star in Frankie and Johnny, Dicks Tracy and Insomnia.    

So overall I was not particularly impressed by this so-called 'classic'. There is just so little to actually say about it. People just talk and die, talk and die. Why would anyone want to see that?

*  (it gets an extra star for having a horse, but loses this star for killing the horse)

The Elephant Man (1980)

                        

Director: David Lunch
Starring: Sir Anthony Hopkins, John Hurt, Ken Boon, Anne Bancroft, John Geelgood

A tragic, moving, sad, emotional story of a man struggling with a hideous deformity, The Elephant Man is nothing like other superhero films. For a start there are no special effects and no explosions. This is a person we should be feeling sorry for, rather than applauding his extraordinary abilities.

Also, The Elephant Man is true. He was a real person. This is a fact. As far as I am aware Spiderman was pure fiction! LOLZ! Seriously though, Spiderman is not real.

Unlike Grease, The Elephant Man is filmed entirely in black & white. There are also no songs. This gives the film a great sense of the olden days. A time when we relied on steam trains and bubonic plague was rife. A time known as Victorian times.

Anthony Hopkins plays Dr Frederick Treeves. A brilliant young brain surgeon, he decides to take the night off and visit the circus. This is believable because sport and cinema had yet to be invented.

Whilst there he heads into the Freak Tent and is shocked and fascinated by the Elephant Man, a deformed person on display for cheap laughs. The Elephant Man's owner is a cruel gypsy, so Treeves kidnaps him (the Elephant Man, not the gypsy) and takes him back to the London Hospital. After showing everyone that he can talk, the Elephant Man becomes the toast of London society. Then he dies and the film ends.

Anthony Hopkins is superb as Treeves. Fresh from playing the title character in Alfred Hitchcock’s classic PSYCHO! (also filmed in black and white) he plays the arrogant doctor with consumate skill. Hopkins actually trained to become a fully qualified brain surgeon in preparation for the role. Such was his committment to realism.

Elephont Man was a springboard to greater things for Hopkins. Soon after this film he was totally drenched with the ubiquity fire-hose and went on to appear in such huge hits as Silence of the Lambs, Amistad and Tron.

John Hurt is excellent as Elephant Man. Unrecognisible under heavy layers of make-up (that reportedly took 7 days to apply), he creates a very sad, sympathetic character. He also looks seriously cool with his mask on.

After this John Hurt appeared in Alien, Indiana Jones and Contact. He did not wear the Elephant Man make-up in any of these films.

Also keep an eye out for Anne Bancroft as a woman and Sir John Geelgood as a man. Both are excellent in these small, but essential roles.

Director David Lunch directs with authority. He also creates a superb atmosphere, covering his sets with the thick smoke and decay of Victorian London, a decay that still exists today - except with added ultra-violence, graffiti and general malaise. I have no idea what else he made after this film.

There are so many subtexts too. By showing Elephant Man off to his rich doctor friends isn’t Treeves really just as bad as the nasty gypsy? Food for thought? More like a FEAST for thought! Seriously though, there is lots going on under the surface. Sadly I don't have the time to elaborate as I am currently running late for the Framlingham Leek Festival.

There are some hilarious moments (such as when the Elephant Man is chased around Grand Central Station in London), but this is not really a comedy. There is also some blistering action (such as when the Elephant Man is chased around Grand Central Station in London), but this is not really an action film.

No, it is a TRUE film. A drama about a triumph over adversity. I wept when I watched it for the first time, and I wept when I watched it for the second time. I was currently half way through my third watch when my DVD went missing, so on that occasion I wept for different reasons. But I am weeping again now.

This should be reason enough for you to watch it and weep too.

* * * * *

Warm regards, Skip

Grease 2 (1982)

Director: Unknown
Starring: Michelle Pfeiffer, Maxwell House, Adrian Zod, Sid Caeser, Eve Ardon

Quite simply the greatest sequel ever made, Grease 2 picks up exactly where Grease 1 left off (albeit three years later). Everything is EXACTLY the same at Rydell High School apart from all of the students and most of the teachers. The songs are also different, and the violence has been toned down a little.

The Pink Ladies are still there too. This time lead by Michelle Pfeiffer as Stephanie. This was Michelle's first film and she is terrific. Although not as desirable as Olivia Newton-John, she is still very good. I also love her hair. She went on to star in Scarf Ace and Labyrinth.

The T-Birds are also back, although this time they are obsessed by motorbikes instead of cars. They are a fearsome bunch of scoundrels who favour swift brutality. Their leader is Zod.

The plot involves an English exchange student called Michael (Maxwell Coal Field). Everyone thinks he is a giant square and nowhere near popular enough to hang around with the ultra-trendy T-Birds. He is also forbidden from dating a Pink Lady due to an ancient code that I didn't really understand.. Personally I thought his blazers, light grey slacks and penchant for tweed to be the epitome of style, but what do I know! LOLZ! Maxwell is very good as Michael, perhaps too good. After Grease 2 he was abducted by the anonimity mothership and disappeared from our screens altogether. He recently appeared in Casualty on BBC1 playing the same character.

Moving on, if you thought the plot to Grease 1 was complex, wait till you hear this; Michael buys a motorbike and disguises himself behind a helmet and goggles. He calls himself the 'Cool Rider' and delights Stephanie by careering wrecklessly around a large car park. Naturally they begin seeing each other but he remains mysterious due to his insistance upon wearing the helmet at every opportunity. This creates a Clark Kent/Superman type scenario whereby Stephanie just cannot tell the difference between these two guys who are really the same guy! It is a superb plot device that keeps the proceedings totally unpredictible. It also explains why I always confuse this film with Superman.

Of course, the T-Birds do not like Stephanie seeing the Cool Rider because it breaks the afforementioned code (which I still fail to grasp). She sees him anyway, creating a dramatic tension that is almost impossible to bear. Meanwhile, the square and anonymous Michael does everybodies homework because he is English and genetically more intelligent than any of the Americans. He also refuses to kneel before Zod.

I won't reveal the ending, but Michael removes his helmet and goggles at a huge Hawaiian-themed party and Stephanie embraces him and accepts him for who he is. Everyone sings a happy song about mutual respect and they all graduate from high school. Roll credits.

The songs are sensational. The opening song Back To School is a rip-snorter which focuses on the kids all returning to school after the summer. There is a song set in bomb-shelter (though thankfully without the nuclear menace that one would associate with such an environment) and another song set in a bowling alley(though thankfully without the nuclear menace that one would associate with such an environment).

The best song is a ballard called Charades. As sung by Michael, I imagine it really sums up the frustration of leading a double life. He wants Stephanie to accept him for who is, not a mindless stuntman who cavorts around on a stinking, noisy motorbike (like most, if not all motorbike owners)

The motorbike scenes are breathtaking though. The best bit is when Michael shows up at the bowling alley as 'Cool Rider' for the first time. He wows the assembled masses with a totally stunning selection of wheelies and modest jumps before roaring off into the night. Moments later he returns and everyone sings a song called 'Who's That Guy', which features my favourite lyric of the film:-

Cast: 'Who's that guy, on that motorcycle?'
Michael: (thinking, but singing) 'What would they say if they knew it was Michael!'

The scene culminates with a jaw-dropping jump over a police car, which ironically would have put Michael in Casualty had he fallen off in mid-air. Or indeed if he had ploughed directly into the side of the police car. Or skidded underneath and been impaled on the chassis and exhaust.

Anyway, time to finish. Hopefully this review has convinced you to seek out this classic film. If Grease 2 were a bird it would be a golden eagle soaring at a slightly lower altitude to Grease 1, because Grease 1 is still best. Just!

* * * * *

Warm regards, Skip

Grease (1978)

Director: Randal Kleiser
Starring: Michael Biehn, John Trovolta, Olivia Newton-John, Kenickie, Stockard Channing, fRANKIE aVALON, Sid Caeser

Where better to begin than my favourite film for all times. I could watch Grease over and over again, and I do. I still find it as fresh and exciting as the first time I watched it two years ago.

Easily the best musical ever made (with the songs to match), Grease is surprisingly not set in Greece at all. From the drainage gulleys visible later in the film, it is clearly set in America. The accents are also a giveaway.

A vibrant tale of teenage love set against the backdrop of the 1950s, it tells the tale of Danny Zuckoh (John Travolata). A violent thug with a soft centre, he falls in love with a square prude called Sandy (played with zeal by Olivia Newton John). Of course, Danny's violent friends think this is ridiculous, so he harshly dumps her on Bonfire Night in front of everyone (Sandy is Australian but ends up going to the same school as Danny after they share a summer romance together on an unidentified coast at the start of the film)

But Danny's soft centre prevails and he pursues Sandy regardless. Unable to resist his singing voice, she decides to go out with him. Pretty soon the T-Birds (Danny's gang) have all softened up and start dating the Pink Ladies (a nick name for morally dubious girls). Approximately 45 minutes later the film ends.

The plot is great, but its the songs that really resonate. And I love the way that the characters just start singing for no reason. It's mad! I often wish that I could get away with doing this. Sadly, spontaneous singing in Ipswich town centre would most likely see me attacked by drug-addicted ruffians.

The songs include the classic Summer Days, Hopelessly Demoted, Summer Days and Grease Lightning. The best song though is Grease Is The Word, sung by the Bee Gees in their pomp. I often drive around Framlingham listening to this song at a sensible volume.

Then of course there are the characters. Trovolta has never been better than as Danny. He is believable yet also quite amusing. And his dancing speaks for itself. Sadly, post-Grease Travolta was stung by the complacency wasp and failed to make a good film again until Look Who's Talking in 2009. A real shame.

Olivia Newton John is a personal favourite of mine. In truth Sandy is my perfect woman. My search goes on to find her! Seriously though, I am aware that she is entirely fictional. Nevertheless she has a great scene where she resits Danny's advances at the cinema and slams a car door on his genitals. Hilarious! Outside of Grease she has had many triumphs, not least the huge hit Physical (Let's Get) which was sadly kept from the Number 1 spot by Foreigner's Waiting For A Girl Like YOU in 1982. Luckily I love Foreigner, so for me this was a sensational double whammy.

Stockard Channing is excellent as the shameless school Jezebel and Kenickie is superb playing himself. The T-Birds are a motley bunch whose rough exterior and criminal ways are curbed by the adorable Pink Ladies (only one of whom is actually attractive). There is also an excellent villain called The Scorpion. He doesn't appear much but he is a menacing character, omnipresent throughout.

There are also many older faces, such as Eve Ardon as the school principal and Caeser as the football coach. And keep you eyes peeled for future Terminator Michael Biehn embarrassing himself as a dancing extra.

Of course there are many moments that I don't fully understand. Such as Rizzo expressing delight at not being pregnant. Surely this is good news? And why don't the gang members pay to visit the cinema? Silly plot holes that fortunately do not detract from my enjoyment of the film.

Anyway, I implore you to check this out. If Grease were a bird it would be a golden Eagle, soaring high above all other musicals and even eating a few for breakfast!

Highly recommended.

* * * * *

Best wishes, Skip